Brainwashed

I was thinking today about V, not the recent V for Vendetta movie that inspired last summer's Occupy movement but the 1980s television miniseries V.

Specifically I was thinking about how the resistance fighters in that would be brainwashed by the evil reptile aliens and then magically switch from left handed to right handed (or the other way around).

Obviously I've switched my dominant hand since the stroke because my right hand barely works, but specifically I was thinking about how I wipe my bottom.

Before the stroke I wiped back to front and now, after having been wiped by women since summer, I've noticed I wipe front to back.

It reminds me of the ads that student health services used to run in the Kernel about, "boy cats should wipe whichever way they like but girl cats should always wipe front to back."

The advert ran with a picture of a wildcat mascot grinning and giving a thumbs up.

That grinning wildcat haunts me every time I go to the bathroom. It's as if he wants to say, "You've had a traumatic brain injury and you'll never be right again."